EXAMS!!

i feel so so so damn bad not studying AT ALL for the past 2 days..

i'm gonna go all out studying for this term's exams starting tomorrow..this is my vow..

no more lazing around no more "i'll study later" no more tv just study study study!!!

GUY DAY OUT!! (sounds gay)

after having some heart to heart talk with Cheryl on friday night i decided i need a break from my own life..i have to admit only after re-reading that conva i realise how fucked up i seemed to be..everything i said was really negative and it really just brings my morale down..the whole day i was feeling really off..so i decided on saturday i'm not gonna go jobweek (sorry Li Shawn) cause i seriously DO NOT feel well at all..i don't wanna transfer my negative energy to you guys..

so on saturday afternoon i went to 1u to watch IRON MAN and SPEED RACER..just me,myself and i(sounds familiar)!! it's like a guy day out but all by myself..IRON MAN was just as i expected..but the suit was really really cool..can't wait for the sequel..after that i watched SPEED RACER which was equally cool..i have to say i've never seen such a movie where humans are humans but everything else is animated at the same time..i spent a long time in the arcades too..just playing, playing and playing but i've only spent around 10 bucks there so to me it's time and money well spent..playing in the arcade, i just forget about everything else in the world..i enjoyed myself immensely and i actually finished the Advance level of Daytona with 15 seconds to spare.. i'm getting more and more pro edi..can't say the same for my pool skills..sucked pretty badly..


Gryffindor should change their mascot from a lion to IRON MAN..


my new favourite car..

i went looking for my colleagues too when i was in 1u..i haven't seen them in AGES and yet they did not changed one bit..i enjoyed chatting with them..the smile on their faces when they saw me was just amazing..it warms my heart..at 1st i just wanted to go there say hi then ciao but they are my family..at least they still treat me like a younger brother..Choy Yee was like the happiest to see me based on her reactions and immediately she noticed that i'm darker..and Sin Fei had to punch me after so many months..of course there's Vin who's gayness never stop amazes me..there's also Sky(yes he intro himself as Sky when we 1st met) who i think forgotten my name and just calls me lengzhai on that day..i had to go back the 2nd time since a few of them was having lunch at the time and also cause Siew Lian told me Bee Ling was saying just the other day "eh Yang kinda long never come visit us edi hor" so i HAD to at least say hi to her..so after SPEED RACER i went back and saw both Bee Ling and Mona..again they seemed really happy to see me..and also almost immediately they say that i'm darker..am i really that dark?? anyway Mona actually saw through me and asked if i had problems..at 1st she asked if i got relationships problem which was only half correct but not wanting to worry her i just denied..she said i looked rather grave as if i got into a fight with a close friend..it's moments like these that makes me cherish them more then ever..they made me realise that i'm not such a loser that i thought i am..the fact that i can bring smiles to their faces when they see me proofs that i'm not such a terrible guy..

after my day out,i realised that i've got to move on with life no matter what..at times i really wished i was back at SEED working and spending time with my colleagues but that's just not the way for me..the only reason they're there working cause they had no money to study..i also realised that if i start liking someone else then i'll need to be brave or in other words BE A MAN,MAKE BALLS FOR MYSELF(sounds wrong)..i thought liking *cough* was torture but THIS takes things to a whole new level..i'm just really confused now about my feelings..for both of them..

on another note

this is my 4th family (1st being my REAL family,2nd is my friends and 3rd is my colleagues)

PURPLE HOUSE!!!

I LOVE YOU GUYS TILL DEATH!!

and i promise i'll be back for next year's Sports Day to help out as long as someone keeps me posted about it..by then i'll be able to drive too..

emo post

I HATE BEING EMO EMO EMO EMO EMO!!!!

i never had an emo moment in such a long time..this whole day..well not the whole day mostly after tuition when i've finally had time for myself i suddenly had an emo attack..and i'm still emo now..

i really don't know whats happening to me..i just feel so so so so off the whole day and thats the truth..the day was fine nothing bad happened but somehow i still feel something is wrong..like something isn't happening..

i hate myself for being so weak now..to make things worse i'm listening to really really emo songs..i really can't help it..


WHY WHY WHY!!!

expedition..

after more than a few months..i went CYCLING!!

around 5 plus i cycled over to ah neh's place..mark tagged along so we went we went to the OTAI burger stall behind SHELL..according to Uncle Shah(ah neh's driver) the burgers there are nice..110% crap..the burgers there were the worst EVER tasted in my entire life (excluding those burgers that i had from fund raisers) my ayam special tasted like..nothing..tasteless shit..it was so dreadful i didn't take a pic of it..i threw around a quarter of the burger..too terrible..

then we went looking for CENDOL..1st CENDOL stop was opposite PETRONAS..sau dong edi so we went to the other side of TAMAN TUN..that wan oso sau dong..manyak DULAN cycling here and there so we decided to stop at Makbul and yamcha there..both me and mark ordered ice kacang..damn big and only for 3.50..damn dai..ah neh ordered ROJAK and MEGGI GORENG TAK MAU PEDAS TAK MAU SAYUR..ice kacang was so so so damn good..Makbul is so going to be one of my yamcha place when i get to drive..that's after Murni..

went home and stoned until now..and i need to get started on studying..exams 2 weeks away..no mood..no matter what i'll have to push myself..this term's target..as always..PASS EVERY SINGLE DAMN SUBJECT!!



i'm everyone's friend..but i'm no one's best friend..not complaining..just observation..
and why the hell am i feeling so confused..is it temporary??

random post..

anyway i really want to blog about sports day but i want to wait for the pictures to arrive from all the other ungu members..i don't know how many cameras were used so i'll just have to slowly find out myself..for now i shall just recap my sports day..

thursday:- i spent the whole freaking day in school from 8am till 8pm(except for the 2 hours in tuition)..i followed Mr.William around to buy stuff for the house but since it was Labours Day a lot of shops didn't open so everything was bought in Old Town which was much much more expensive than usual..just so you guys know..you need nerves of steel to sit in Mr.Williams car..he's driving is just so so so.."YENG"..the whole day i was training the marchers and helping out the deco..i'm just a bit disappointed the 2 Pegasus was a bit too tiny..

friday:- from morning till late evening i was in school building the gadjet to be used as the "Temple of Victory".. i went home around 6.30pm,bathed,ate and went back to school..instead of helping my fellow house members,i went yamcha with wei ren,brianC,brianL and Kah Joon at Murni SS2..i didn't regret it at all..it was the funniest time ever..1st Wei Ren got into a small *cough* then while in Murni somehow i was the entertainer for once..i guess i was too tired and didn't think through properly before i spoke..everything i said wasn't really making any sense..anyway on the way back school the 5 of us in the Satria was constantly laughing due to Wei Ren's *cough* lack of judgement *cough* in driving..it was fun,exciting and scary at the same time..and Kah Joon honked some Indian/Malay guy (i don't know whichever) cause he simply crossed the road..

friday night/saturday early morning:- i helped the deco team(just a lil) and then went off to work with the gadjet..i wanted to sleep at around 12 somethign since everyone is pushing me to sleep as i was to run on Sports Day..but how could i with all the useless form4 assholes (one in perticular) who does his job terribly and doesn't help others..in the end i slept at 2.30am but had to wake up around 3am to check on the assholes..at least this time Wei Kuang is awake..so that's the end of my involvement in the Deco..

Sports day:- i woke up around 5.30am,wash up and went to check on the marchers..they looked great and Zeus(Wei Chuen) looked..rather real..so i had a piece of bread from Soo Ling,banana from Li Shawn and Red Bull from Xiau Yen for breakfast which was really great..at least i had the energy to run for the 2 events i was participating in..

that's my Sports Day..i just want to say i'm really really proud of the marchers..even though they didnt win they gave it their all which means a lot to me..(i doubt any of them reads my blog) and also special thanks to Li Shawn,Neal,Cindy,Pei Wen,Xiau Yen,Wei Kuang for supporting me and each other during the whole event..not forgetting all the other ungu members and also REN HONG for betraying his rumah and helping us with the decos..i love you guys till death..

for now..I WANT THOSE BLOODY PICTURES!!!


i feel so lost now..i'm really confused about myself,my feelings..what should i do??(i know it's damn random but i can't help myself..need to express my feeling somehow)